whineration

lca_1, originally uploaded by DreamersParadise.

I think about lots of things during the day.. but whenever I'm all ready to pen it all down, it's all lost in space again. I have really bad memory and it does bother me quite a bit. And i can't carry a journal around, and even if i do, i'll lose the pen or the journal. I think about stuff when I'm running, when my mind's spaced out after the first ten minutes of monotonous panting.. Sometimes, I get excited and really motivated over an idea, while other times, bored and uninspired till the point i'll head straight to the changing room.."perhaps tommorow i'll do an extra hour"..

But most of the time, i'm thinking of my purpose here, reflecting.. religion, friends, family.. I find myself drifting away from this world, seeking significance from my own world. I grow to be comfortable being unimportant, and it doesn't matter what others say or think... cos it doesn't matter to me. Maybe it's just the way I look or speak, or im probably confined to the time I have to hang out. Yea, I probably have no life in other words. I don't PS or boardgame (but i play soccer!). It's just different frequency la.

Maybe I've spent too much time in my youth skateboarding, girlfriending, seeking thrills in rebellion, and now I still can't balance a normal life. I don't have a suicidal friend, or a friend that ask me," eh, how.." or tell someone about the fight i had with my dad.. or figure out issues that involve other people. I'm left with normal mundane life. Again, I'm not complaining. Just bored, really. As in, emotionally bored. I've got lots of work.